1. |
Elation
20:00
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a forlorn warehouse, loosely hanging on to the edge of space. illumination from a fading star, dim and blue. it covers the sky, and bleeds into the building through its shattered windows and fractured wrought iron frames. the looming presence in the sky looks to be giving one of its final performances. a desperate ejaculation of plasma pouring down and out and into the unfeeling aether. a helix descends. a force of raw energy leaking out like blood from a mortal wound. endlessly and helplessly streaming from the formerly incandescent body. you're sliding out now, falling into it just as it falls out and into nothing. so you will be. and then you will not. a tear flowing freely down a miserable cheek but there is no hand to wipe you away.
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2. |
Shame
20:00
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3. |
Passive
20:00
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there is something inside of you that wants to be put out
two contusions around the ribs. a puncture wound (knife?) under the right breastbone. a display of violence or of love. clinical. semen dried on the clavicle. heart stilled. eyes wide, decomposition mild. left thigh torn apart, exposing bone. scars cover what intact skin remains. they are old, and unimportant. ligature marks at the neck. hyoid fractured and healed several times. did you do that to yourself? or did you get someone else to do it for you? this type of injury rarely occurs without meaning. we both know that. and this type of fixation rarely occurs in isolation. there are always comorbidities. what else did the you who is no longer you enjoy? what did you get out of it? this never resolves. it's something you lived with. were you guilty, or were you proud? glad at your deviancy? taking some pleasure at knowing that you're abnormal? post-mortem wounds show evidence of further tampering. bloodless lacerations cover the stomach and back, splitting apart old, irrelevant scars. hypertrophy and keloid, bulging. white thin lines where you never tried hard enough. you couldn't manage it by yourself, could you? it's a kind of co-dependency. was this a way of dealing with the suffering you found in life? or was it the cause? did you think you would grow up to be like this? were you proud of who you became? how you ended up lifeless on faux wood laminate flooring. you weren't eating much at the end, were you? was that intentional, or were you just too focused on what you were becoming?
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4. |
No Pulse
20:00
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poppy seeds; black coffee, black lungs. contented by the kiss of a razor. there is something inside of you that wants to be put out. to be set free, to unwind and spill out. so hard to keep your eyes open. only skin deep but you still feel it in your heart. i will always be there, but when you reach out to hold me i spread out and fall up, like smoke in your hands. when i go, please can you come with? i've spent my life alone, will you love me in death? the nights when you don't sleep, see me from the corner of your eye. a phantom haunting you. it will be like this for the rest of your life.
the space between your ribs. forearms and wrists like glass, ready to be broken with a touch, a kiss, or when they're pressed onto a bed. you're barely there
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Illusory Games Canberra, Australia
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